Fili, Kili, and the Mountain Goat
by AKFicChick
Summary: A one shot of Fili and Kili as young dwarfs causing mischief.


One fine afternoon two young dwarf brothers, Fili and Kili, were busy relaxing after an eventful morning of wrestling and driving their mother to her wits' end. Fili, the older of the two, idly picked his teeth while his younger brother, Kili napped on the ground next to him, drool forming a puddle on the dusty surface under him.

Just then the sound of tumbling stone made Fili turn and look. Behind him, higher up on the mountain was the biggest, wooliest mountain goat he had ever seen. Without taking his wide eyes off the animal, Fili stretched a leg out and nudged Kili with the toe of his boot. Kili only grumbled, "Geroff!" swatting at Fili's foot while rolling over to continue his nap. So Fili, with a great roll of his eyes and a heavy sigh, turned and nudged his brother harder. Kili, now wide awake, jumped up and leaped onto Fili's back, preparing to pummel him, but Fili caught the younger dwarf and held a finger over his own lips to silence him, then pointed up the mountain. Kili looked and his eyes grew to a size bigger than his pudgey hands.

"That's the biggest goat I've ever seen!" Kili breathed as he crouched behind the boulders with his brother.

"Let's cath it!" Fili suggested, a wild gleam in his eyes.

Kili's face split into a gap-toothed grin as Fili began to inch carefully over the rocks. "Follow my lead," he whispered to Kili as he eased out his slingshot from a pocket deep in his coat. Kili nodded and clambered after Fili.

They quietly climbed up to a pile of rocks near the goat and hid behind them. The goat was calmly cropping on the sparse vegatation that grew up so high, unaware of the two little dwarves sneaking up on it.

Fili turned to Kili. "Alright, I'm going to scare it down to a place we can trap it," Fili told Kili, holding up his slingshot.

Kili watched eagerly as Fili loaded the cradle and aimed. He let the stone loose and it cracked off a rock just next to the goat. The beast started and began scurrying over the rocks, making its way down the mountain. Fili whooped, Kili copying him and each jumped up and ran in pursuit.

Along the way, Fili loaded stone after stone, sending each one rocketing to spots just near the goat, steering it towards a dwarf trail along the mountain's face.

The two young dwarves laughed and hollered all the while until they had the goat cornered.

Fili motioned for Kili to stay back while he inched forward, pulling out his emergency rope from a pack at his side. He slowly tied a loop in the rope and deftly swung it round the goat's head.

Instantly, the creature began to buck and twist its body around, jumping around and tugging on the rope. Its nearly 300 pounds becoming too much for Fili to handle. "Kili! Help!" Fili grunted.

Kili let out a war cry and took a running leap onto the enormous animal that was nearly twice as tall as he was. He landed on the beast's woolen back and that's when it jerked the rope free of Fili's grasp and went careening past the older dwarf boy. Fili charged after it, screaming at Kili to hang on tight.

Ahead, Kili bounced high on the goat, his legs flailing and his arms straining to keep a hold of the thing's shaggy wool.

Meanwhile, out for a bit of fresh air, Dis, Fili and Kili's mother was standing with her hands on her hips, enjoying the quiet afternoon.

That's when an animal went rushing past with a little dwarf boy squealing with glee riding on its back. They were being pursued by a fair-haired dwarf boy waving his arms over his head, yelling at the animal and its rider.

For a moment after they passed, Dis held her breath, praying she hadn't seen what she'd just witnessed. Then she gave up, letting out her breath in a great rush of air and off she went, chasing after her delinquent sons.

For a long while Kili continued to bounce and flounce on the back of the goat. When the thing leaped over an edge, Kili closed his eyes and screamed as the air rushed past him, whistling in his ears.

He grunted when the goat landed agilely on the ledge below, straight in the middle of a group of grown dwarves taking a late lunch. They all exclaimed and shook their fists or axes at the wild boy. When Fili landed among them they stopped. When Dis went running through, they began to laugh uproariously, their great bellies shaking with the effort. Then they began cheering the boys on.

Soon the creature began to tire but it still refused to stop. That is, until it rounded a bend and there before it was a large dwarf with dark hair and hard eyes. He grabbed the goat by the horns, effectively stopping it in its tracks and sending Kili flying off the animal's back. The big dwarf let go of the goat and lunged for Kili, catching him against his chest. They landed in a great heap, stone dust billowing up about them.

"Kili!" Fili cried out, then stopped short as the dust cleared and there sat a grinning Kili, his dark curls in disarray, behind him a very unhappy Thorin. Kili's grin disappeared as he looked up to find Thorin's steely gaze trained on him. Then he turned absolutely white as Dis rounded the bend at last. Her cheeks ablaze from exertion and anger.

Later, as the boys lay in silence on their beds, having been sent there with no dinner, Kili dug in his blankets and pulled out a bundle which he threw to Fili. The older dwarf unwrapped it to find a hunk of bread, a large chunk of meat, two potatoes, and a thick slice of cheese. He looked over at Kili who was enjoying his own meal and the two laughed quietly as they consumed their secret, pilfered meal.


End file.
